Monday, November 17, 2008

Alive and well......

I mean really well. Total up to 180 lbs. lost. Sometimes I think "oh, 180 pounds,,that's good." And then sometimes I think "Holy crap! 180 pounds?????" Yesterday was a "Holy crap!" kind of day. Had an eye-opening day yesterday.
We started out the day going to church. We then went to lunch and Discover Mills. Yes, I went shopping. In a roundabout way, the one thing that you would expect to lure me to shopping was the key - college football. I had a gift card to Tailgater's Alley. I went to see if they had a white hoodie that would fit me. Thursday night against Miami is a whiteout and the only white stuff I have will not be warm enough for a night game. So I went to a store and bought clothes off a rack. They had one that fit me! Are you hearing me? I bought something off a rack!!! I tried on other stuff. They had lots of stuff that fit me. I had tried on other stuff so that maybe Rhonda can give people gift ideas. Instead of telling them "you'll have to order it from the 'GOD YOU'RE HUGE!' catalog" she can tell them "they have a jacket at Tailgater's Alley he wants." I stood in the middle of that store and started crying. So did my bride. People in the packed store probably thought "Wow - those people love Georgia Tech!"
We left that store and walked around the mall for a while longer. Not one single person stared at the fat guy. Not one child pointed and laughed. I wasn't sweating to death. I didn't stop every five minutes to rest. We left the mall and went to the grocery store. More walking and I was fine. I didn't go home and take painkillers for my knees and ankles and go to bed. I felt alive for the first time in years.
My sister has long compared me to the George Bailey character in "It's A Wonderful Life." I relate to the way the man felt about himself, but I fear she overestimates the "being important in other people's lives angle" where I'm concerned. That said there's one scene in that movie I relate to more than any other. When he's standing on the bridge screaming to The Almighty "I wanna live again..I wanna' live again!" I'm not trying to be a martyr when I tell you that I've been screaming that for years now. My weight has kept me from being the husband, brother, son and friend I should be. My weight has kept Rhonda from having much to look forward to. Yesterday I truly felt alive. The day we spent probably seems routine for some of you. For me it was but a peek into how good things are about to become. I'm looking forward to the ride.

1 comment:

Elisabeth7291 said...

T - That's awesome! I'm amazed at your progress. It sounds like you are really relishing the victories along the way & I'm so happy for you! And, WE NEED TO GET TOGETHER!! We go to California this weekend, but we'll be around Thanksgiving weekend, so let's get together maybe that Saturday night? Check with your bride. . .