Friday, May 22, 2009


The ushering gig continues. In fact it looks to be a permanent move. Thank you God. With the aforementioned deity as my witness, I dropped three pounds last night and I only worked 7 innings (slim crowds mean some ushers go home early.)
In the third inning last night, some folks began crowding the guests in wheelchairs that were sitting in the handicapped portion of my section. I asked them to back up and not hover over the folks in the wheelchairs. One of the folks in a wheelchair thanked me. He said "It's good to have somebody up here watching out for us. OBVIOUSLY nobody's going to try and get through you!" I must admit, I stuck my chest out a bit and my head swelled just a little. Nice trip back to the old days when folks thought of me as the big, strong guy and I got the call whenever it was time to move something heavy or someone was causing trouble. Honesty compels me to admit that (if I can quote James Joyce) "...he spoke roughly in order to belie his air of gentility..." I was always more bartender than bouncer...but nobody needed to know that and I used my size as an advantage many times back in my young, heathen days. For too long, though, I went from being that guy to being the unhealthy, sick guy. I felt like a million bucks being the big, strong guy for someone again.
Ran across a picture of me when I was in my early 20's. Showed it to my sister. Melinda says "'re that small again..." I started to laugh it off but then realized she's probably right. I can probably wear the shorts I was wearing in that picture...well, if they weren't horribly short and would make me look like I was on a Village People reunion tour. It also wouldn't hurt my feelings to have as much hair as I had in that picture (on my head, I mean..not in my ears or eyebrows, the two places where I now easily grown hair.) It was much more of a compliment to me than, say, the picture she sent me of a guy sporting a mullet leaning up against a truck. She reminded me that I used to sport a mean mullet myself. Uh, yeah, but it looked REALLY good on me..right? Somebody? Anybody?
Now where else can you go and enjoy a discussion on James Joyce AND mullets? They call that being well-rounded (or full of useless information...or full of something....I'm odd I tell ya')


e_sgw said...

and you didn't post either picture because...?

Kimberly said...

Funny, "back in the day," they were not referred to as MULLETS...I think that came about in the 90's...thanks to Billy Ray Cyrus. I have a few photos of you with hair and "mid-thigh" shorts!